Ep. 4 The Four Phases of Your Menstrual Cycle

**This transcript has been created with Otter.ai and has not yet been edited for flow. Please read with grace and enjoy!

Hello. I'm AJ, the joy Weaver. Welcome to episode four of Oh my goodness. I'm really excited to dive into one of my favorite topics, and that is cycles. We recently had a red tent about this, and I have done, gosh, 20 plus red tense workshops on this theme. It's got to be more than that by this point. And every time, every time there are tears, there is relief, there is, oh, I'm not crazy, there is, I get to teach my kids this now, oh my gosh, my daughter just got her period. This is perfect timing. There is why didn't anybody tell me this before, and I didn't even know the whole spectrum.

And so I'm really excited to put this on the podcast, because I think this is essential learning for literally every human because even if you don't cycle, you know someone who does, and also, if you have a uterus, if you cycle, or if you used to cycle, but you don't anymore, whether you had a hysterectomy or you're on birth control, or any other reasons stress, your body is still cycling, Sometimes just in smaller ways. And men are built in this like solar cycle, like 365, like Go, go, go. They have smaller cycles that don't impact them as much, but as women, we have these wider cycles that are impacting us more, monthly, weekly, daily, than we maybe want to give it credit for and so we're just going to go through them.

And sometimes I teach fast, so I'm trying to go slow, so that way, in case there's not a half speed button, you've got me and you don't miss anything. You're always welcome to post a comment or send me an email if you want me to elaborate on anything. This is also out of my book, red thread weaving and embodied life of joy, which is on Amazon currently that you can purchase. Okay, let's dive in. In case you didn't know, you have four phases in your cycle. A lot of people think there is your period and then not your period, that it's just this, like, out of the blue, like, hello, and flows in town. And you're like, gobsmacked. And you're like, Oh, my goodness, this makes sense why I was all over the place three days ago, or why I ate a whole box of brownies the other night.

No judgment, right? We've all been there, and when we know more, we can show up differently with awareness, right? So anything that comes up, if shame, guilt or like, Oh, why didn't I know this before? Let's just greet that with some love and say, Man, that would be cool. Good thing. I know this now, right? What a gift to learn information, to either pass on to other people, or to have your self for awareness as you're interacting with other people.

Okay, so our four phases we have, and I'm going to start them off, and I'm going to go by moon phases, essentially, and then you'll see what I'm saying. Okay, so our first phase is our waxing moon stage. This is our growing stage. This is our pre ovulation stage. And what that means is your energy is rising, so your estrogen is rising. This is right after your period kind of ends, right? There's like that little middle area where your period's kind of stopping, and then you're like, I'm in a human I have all this energy, and it's fabulous. It's fabulous.

And as you have that extra energy, be careful not to overspend it, because what happens is, if your period is anywhere from 21 days or 28 days, you'll be like, Oh my gosh, I want to do all of the things because you have all this extra energy, because the estrogen is like, let's take over the world. And you're like, yes. And then you schedule it out, and maybe people aren't available this week or next week, but in three weeks, you know what's coming back around. In three weeks, you're a period. So when we're aware of these things, we can schedule accordingly.

You see where I'm going with this, right? So this is a time to knock out things on your list. This is a time to have big conversations. This is a time to do action items in your menstrual phase, which we'll talk about in a little bit. That's your visioning time, your dreaming time of like, okay, what's working, what's not working. So this is your get it done, knock it out, taking the things to the thrift store that have been in the back of the car, if you need to, like, wash the floorboards, host a get together. This is perfect time for that. So that's this stage.

And in each stage there's also archetypes. I got this idea originally from Lucy Pierce, who had some, and then I added and adjusted some of my own. So the archetypes in the stage are virgin and maiden. And for some people, Virgin means a woman unto herself as well. So not just someone who hasn't had sex, but this, like, fresh, shy, bushy tailed, like, okay, like, we can do the things like that, effervescent enthusiasm and energy, right? So your tip to remember is engage your dreams with action. Yeah. Okay, our next phase is our full moon stage. This is ovulation. This is also when you're like, let's get it on.

And if you do not want to get pregnant, this is the time to be really cautious, because as much as you might be ready to rumble, if you're not ready to birth, I don't know. I didn't have another acronym, then be extra careful during this time. Also, some people don't know this, but you can ovulate outside of your ovulation stage. Your pre ovulation stage is about five to seven days. Your ovulation stage is about two to five but you can drop multiple eggs, and your ovulation stage might be longer as well. You can get ovulation strips in bulk, and you can test, it's kind of like up on the strip. So you can test as well.

Also, if you've ever had that sticky kind of cervical white fluid, that's cervical fluid, and so it's something called the Creighton method that you can kind of see when you're ovulating. So when it's like, sticky egg Whitey, that's when we're ovulating. In case you're like, what is that?

That's what that is. During this stage, your estrogen is at its height. We've got Mother Bear energy in like, the nourishing, loving way we want to take care of everyone. We're writing notes, we're making plans, we're hosting get togethers, we're doing the crock pot meal planning, like we're on top of it, and also, mama bear can also become Mama Bear like angry panda mode if you feel taken advantage of, if somebody's coming after something that you love, we can get super touchy during this time, and you might have cramps, because what's happening is one of your ovaries is releasing an egg. Think of it as the world's smallest, smallest, smallest, yes, and slowest, snowball fight.

So it's like, one one month and the next month, this one from the other side. So if you have some cramping, you're like, I'm not supposed to get my period for a few weeks. Don't worry. That's just your body cleaning house. Well, not entirely, but that's your body throwing an egg out there to be like, Is this the one? Okay? We're taking beds, right?

So don't worry. All is normal. If you have massive cramping where you cannot breathe, you cannot move, things like that, that's worth talking to a doctor. Does that make sense? Okay? During this time, cultivate and nurture growth in yourself and those around you. Your archetypes are mother and create tricks. Different people resonate with mother in different ways. So this is the to make things. I am childless by choice, and so I understand the the language around birthing and motherhood can be tricky.

And so I want you to think about, what are you creating, what are you bringing into this world? In what is your heart? What do you want to bring forth? Right? If we can kind of change the way we're thinking about this, about this. This is super juicy. Like, oh yeah, this sounds nourishing, right? Bring in some of that pleasure vibes. Because if you're like, oh, you know, you can also bring that into your business, your life, your friendships, of just extra pleasure and decadence. And pleasure doesn't have to mean sex. Pleasure can just mean the way that you feel in the way you're showing up, right? Maybe it's the clothes you wear or the food you eat, like, just take this time, because this is that, yeah, like, it just feels good. Okay, so that's our ovulation stage.

Our third stage is our waning moon stage, right? We're kind of going towards the Dark Side of the Moon, we're going towards our menstrual period. So this is our premenstrual stage. This is also where our hormones are, like high fiving. Our progesterone is going up. Our estrogen is going down. If you're anything like me, I've been cycle charting for about nine years now, which is wild to think about. But you may notice that there are certain times where you feel your body almost shift. I have one day. It's either on day in between 17 and 19 that I just want to get my corn cob holders and like, Do not touch me. Do not pass go.

I feel super touchy and all over the place. And sometimes, because even though I read in my calendar, we're all human, we can forget. I'm like, Why am I feeling so weird? And then I look at my calendar, I'm like, Ah, it's day 18. Okay. In a red tent in Germany that we had, we made cycle bracelets, and we tracked our cycles on how we felt on different days, and then we all brought different beats, which was so cool. I loved this. And you use different beads to put in different parts of your cycle, if that makes sense. And I have this one day that is just really brutal every month that feels weird. And so there's this lava bead.

And I was like, this is rocky and weird, and so I called it my black bead day. And but I know that now, so when I know it's coming, I'm like, Okay, let's be super gentle with ourselves today. And if anything comes up and I get activated, it's probably not them, it's me, right? And this is also the PMs area that can come up. And so this is right before our period, so we might become irritated, like, like, crinkly frenetic inner. Because we also have higher energy during this time that progestion is like,

Yeah, but also like, Mmm, and so it's like, conflicting with, it's the estrogen in it there too, right? So you might be feeling exhausted depending on what you did this month, right? A lot of people don't realize. And there's some science around this about your menstrual cycle being almost your fifth health sign, like, how are you doing?

Kind of can show in your menstrual cycle, and let's acknowledge all the different things that are impacting us. Right? We got medicine, alcohol, food, sleep, drugs, just, I mean all the also food, but pollution, stress, birth control, all of these things impact your cycle. When you move, you may notice, if you're doing international moves, like military families, you may notice that when you're stressed, your period feels different. So your body processes at that partially through your period. So let me know if that makes sense.

But if you're like man, sometimes it's really intense, and sometimes it's not, it is a direct reflection, sometimes, on how much you've done that week and also how much you're stacked into that time too, because this is our Okay, wind it up. Go, go, go. Like, let's come to a close, because we need to, like, cozy in, because we're about to get our period. For me, I have high energy during this stage. I'm currently in this stage as we are in real time. So I have a lot of business things that I'm checking off the box like a fiend.

This week, I had my two workouts today, I went dancing and I went lifting and I ran two miles today, which you might be like, AJ, that's a lot. I run high naturally on a normal day, but in this phase, I'm like, let's go. Let's get it done. So that way I feel like I can rest when I'm on my period. Does that make sense? Everybody's different. The more you know your cycle, the better it'll be. But this is also my favorite stage. Our archetypes are Enchantress and wild women. Like, yes, that's what's up, right? It's just so good.

And that Enchantress and wild woman, they are the women who know. And so when you start knowing things that you're like, Yeah, but no, if you're like, No, I don't know. No, you do know. Are you just too afraid to say it out loud? Bare minimum, say it to yourself? This is that time where a BS meter starts going up and things that throughout the rest of our period, we're like, Ah, it's fine. No big deal. You know that mother energy of like, everybody belongs. Everybody can come here. This is like, No, we do not have time for that. No, my name is no, my number is No, right? You gotta let it go. You gotta let it go.

So our energy levels can fluctuate and feel frenetic. TLC, tender, love and care. I cannot stress this enough, the amount of women who are literally just not drinking any water, or only drinking like one glass of water a day, you need to be drinking like three plus minimum. If you're not drinking water and eating good food during this stage, you will want to pick up your corn cup holders, just Shiv in people in kneecaps. So don't take care of yourself. Get some sleep. If you can and move your body, if you can channel that energy, it's gonna get channeled either way, whether at people or at things, up to you.

Okay, moving on up, moving on up. We got new moon. This is our menstruation phase. Also your waning moon stage, your premenstrual stage, that can last anywhere from five to 10 days, five to seven. It really depends on your cycle and understanding yourself. New Moon is our menstruation phage. This is our archetypes of sage, wise woman, witch Crone. That just like, ah, that bone wisdom in your body. If you feel overwhelmed during this stage or just exhausted, it's usually this is, hey, here's what's true. This is that no, Bs, like, here's just the truth of the matter. We do not have the energy to fight back against holding two truths or holding two stories. This is the time of just like, I hate it all, or this isn't working. And earlier in our cycle, we might be like, Yeah, but it's fine. In this one, we're just like, I don't like it. What if I just ran to the woods? Right?

This is that kind of time where you take a bath and you're like, what if we just, like, sold everything and lived on a cruise ship for the rest of our life? So this is that phase your progesterone is high and your estrogen is at its lowest, because you may feel low, especially if you wrestle with depression or PMDD or pots or what's the thing that thumbs up my head, oh, Endo, anything like that. Y'all, all the TLC, all the taking care of ourselves. As much as we want chocolate, when you're craving chocolate and sweets, you're usually craving protein.

I am team chocolate all the way, and I'm also hear team for food that is nourishing our bodies, some things nourish our soul, like chips and salsa, and some things nourish our bodies and our muscles and our bones. And if you're like, Oh, but I hate bleeding so much, I hear you and your vagina and your uterus are self cleaning mechanisms. So like, imagine if you had to do it yourself, right? It's just kind of like they're like, we're redecorating. Waiting. I don't like these walls.

So you're like, Okay, do you have to do with that intensely? You know, no, but it is what it is. During this time, your dreams may become more vivid, and the texture and the color of your blood can also tell you a lot. So you can go online check all that stuff out, because it's there's so much information. It's wild. It's wild. It's so cool. And use this time for rest and envisioning what's working what's not. If you might be able to get away with some stuff and not face some truths earlier in your cycle, this is a good time to just be honest with yourself and shift those right, because what's coming up next, it's always a cycle.

Is your virgin and your maiden stage, you're gonna have that time to put it in action. This is not our action time. You've got an idea. Cool, write it down and then go take a nap. Go take a hot bath. Go for a walk, like very chill yin yoga vibes, you know, if you want to work out, go for it. But if you ever notice, if you lift heavy weights, I love lifting heavy weights, the way you lift feels different throughout the month, right? Some days you have good days, some days you have bad days, and some days you're like, I just did this last week. What's the problem? It might be because you're on your period, or you're about to get on your period, right?

So different things impact us. Because that's your blood, those are your iron levels. It all relates. It all relates. You're not crazy. When you're like, Why do I feel different? I almost feel like a different person. And if you're your libido, there you go. Your libido is changing throughout the month too. And so sometimes you're like, yes, and other times you're like, No, I love you. I just want to cuddle.

What if we just allowed ourselves to acknowledge all these moving pieces and let them all belong? Wouldn't that be a gift to just see yourself in these different phases and be like, Wow, what a spectrum of possibility I am. Look at my whole stretch of humanity here being honored throughout the month. And I guarantee you, if you actually track this, if you follow, if you even just put in your calendar by like, using code symbols or whatever, like Barbara's in town or whatever, you're going to notice a difference.

Also. Side note, because of the world we live in, which is currently March 2025, I would be very careful about using cycle apps. And I have friends that run them, and I love them pen and paper or, like, use codes, whatever. But just be really careful, because people are tracking things, and it is dangerous times for people who bleed and for a lot of people, so take care of yourself. Be tender and gentle. And yeah, if you have more questions about periods, let me know. My book goes into it even more about cycle, charting different things you can use during your period.

But I wanted this to just be a breakdown about the four phases of your cycle, because I think it's really important information to know. And once you know what you're like, Oh, okay. And then also you can use those archetypes channel it in and be like, Okay, I'm in my Enchantress stage today. What do I want to wear? Okay, I'm in my crone stage. I'm feeling cozy. I'm feeling warm. What do I want to wear today? Right? Go with the flow, literally, and take good care of yourself. I'm proud of you. I love you and seeing yourself on your friends bye.